It has been a quiet couple of weeks, been on training for promotion, which has left me pretty drained mentally and not been going out much. I think the job that I do makes me realise how lucky I am; to have a job, to have somewhere nice to live, and to have a nice life.

It's all anyone can ask for really but with all the ups and downs of the past couple of years, I still have to pinch myself how happy I am. A tiny part of me is just terrified that someone is going to come and take it all way from me, that I don't deserve it or something. But most of the time I just feel incredibly lucky; to work with lovely people, have great friends - who are scattered around the country now so I don't get to see as much of them as I'd like - and, not essential but great; to love and be loved by someone truly amazing.

Have hardly been writing recently, which I feel kind of guilty about, not had a lot of ideas but boyf has given me a couple of ideas. I think writing is the sort of thing that if you get out of the habit, it's hard to get going again, but once I do I write loads.

Have the serendipity of a day off on monday - our course tutor is away and gave us the option. Thought long and hard about what to do with myself, given that I don't get paid till Wednesday. As I travel 1&1/2 hrs each way to work every day I didn't want to travel very far. In the end I have decided to walk the walls of the beautiful city I live in. I am going to take my notebook and camera - a writer's essentials - and reflect on how truly lucky I really am. :)


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